My experience is accountability is a fundamental element of recovery. I was definitely lacking accountability before I came into recovery. My lack of accountability was mainly due to my inability to be honest with myself or others, and not being able to commit to anything other than drug seeking. It was essential that I learn to become accountable if I wanted to stay sober. I needed to change my selfish and self-seeking behaviors.
One common denominator amongst addicts and alcoholics is that we are undisciplined. My first step toward regaining discipline was learning how to make commitments and follow through on them. Making my actions match my words. One challenge in this required that I have someone I could be honest with, and to help hold me accountable. I could no longer only be accountable to myself. It just wasn’t working. For so long I only had to face myself. I was the only one who knew the truth about whether or not I kept my commitments but once there was someone else in the picture, I could not hide from the truth.
The other challenge is being willing to be held accountable for my actions when they were not in alignment with my commitments .My selfish and self-centered attitude, block my awareness of the impact caused by my actions, on others. Realizing this root cause, was a hard notion to accept. Once I began to see the positive impacts of keeping my commitments, I began to gain a new perspective on how and why I made certain choices. The struggles with accountability in sober living that I faced in the beginning of my journey are not unique. They were a classic self will run riot example and trying to change that on my own was not possible. The principle of accountability, is vital component in early recovery.
Written by Chris Wesolick- Admissions Coordinator